They speak as if
there is a choice. They speak as if it is a whim (Howzsbout being gay tonight?)
They speak as if it is a sickness. They speak as if it is peer pressure - they
speak of it as if it were an experiment.
I am very glad I
was not born gay. I don't think I would have the inner strength to deal with
it. And I don't think my family would have understood. You have to be a great
person to let the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune strike you where you
are vulnerable. You need to know when to fight your battles and when to let the
unimportant ones drift away. I would tackle them all as ferociously as I could.
But I was blessed with the ability to understand how to walk in another man's
shoes – and behind him giving support in all he/she may need. I am also
honoured to have gay family members, and lots of gay friends (I love them to
bits)
I am a peoples person.
I am a bit shy/retiring but I love watching people. Often older members of my family
will say comments like "How many blacks are there?" Apparently I have
an expressive face which leaves them in no uncertainty of my opinion of them as
I reply "Do you mean - How many people are there?" I am also a
"Live and let live Kinda gal" If we click I would love to get to know
you better. I don't care what colour, religion, race, height, weight, sexuality,
intelligence factor you have (As long as you are not a bigot.)
I don't care
what happens behind your closed doors. If I like you I will support you. If we
don't gel, I will make you a "nodding" acquaintance.
My gay friends/family:
1.
They support me as no other friend does.
2.
They have a lovely outlook on life – they have faced such trash that
when things go well they sparkle,
3.
We share a lot of the same interests. We can dance together, read
together, listen to classical music together,
4.
We laugh together.
Let's now talk
about the typical SA MALE
Braai, Boerewors
and Rugby with a bit of boxing thrown in – Snide remarks if a hetero guy claims
not to like these things – he's obviously not a real man!
A real man
smokes Camel cigarettes or rolls his own, kills things to eat, fights – for no
reason at all, loves all sports and is happiest becoming obnoxious at a bar? Aha
– you don't like that generalisation do you?
But I can tell
you it takes a REAL man to stand up to his Neanderthal friends when he wants to
learn dancing. No not Hip Hop. Elegant charming ballroom and cheeky Latin ("Mmmmm.
Heard about Chuck? I always thought there was a bit of a moffie there."
"Chuck went
to a concert? Didn't know there was a rap artist in town. "What!! A symphony
concert? AND a ballet? Mmm you never can tell."
"WHAT? He also
went to a play – Not Comedy junction? A play??? He must be gay."
Stereotypes - Stereotypes
–Stereotypes. I feel so sorry for the narrow minded population. They don't know
what they are missing
Let your guard
down a bit – experience LIFE and all it has to offer.
My father loved
the theatre, Opera, dancing, reading and helping out at home. He brought me up
to like the same things. There wasn't a gay bone in his body. He was a refined gentleman.
He encouraged me in my friendships with diverse people and even offered some
advice on how I could support a gay friend who got into trouble with the law. If
he had been alive he would have stood behind me when that same friend was dying
because he left it too late to be diagnosed with HIV. He didn't have a chance –
full blown aids got him medical attention but it was too late to give him life.
I sat with him as he died.
Thanks DAD for
helping me to see that I don't need to know everything about a friend and I can
still be loyal.
So how many
black friends do I have? – Not sure, I have never counted.
How many Gay
friends do you have? – not sure but quite a lot and possibly some I don't even
know as Gay – My friends are my friends.
How many White
friends do I have? – Come on! Seriously? Haven't you got the message yet? I
have friends some are calm, some are crazy, some are good listeners, some lean
on me for support and I lean on some for support.
I wish we could stop
classifying people – it is demeaning
I wish we could
dispense with stupidities – like – watch out – he will make you gay
What would the
bigot do if I were to tell him/her that someone important in their life is
actually gay? Would they really remain bigoted and cast the person aside or
would love prevail?
I choose to love, be
positive and accept everyone for who they are. What do you choose?