As I was travelling home tonight with the radio on, a
listener posed a problem he wanted solved:
He had been going out with this girl for three months and
they had not yet had sex. He claims he bumped into her ex boyfriend who told
him their sexual exploits had started about two weeks into the relationship.
There were various comments from listeners but three caught
my attention:
- “Are you only interested in this girl for sex?”
- “How can you believe an ex-boyfriend? He may be glamourising their relationship.”
- “Ditch her if you haven’t had sex in the first two weeks.”
Three very different takes on the problem. My mind circled
around these three solutions as I watched TV when I got home. And as I watched
I realised something else. Our society has become a very sexual one. We are
actually selling sex to kids and I began to understand where the third comment
came from.
1. Soapies – meet someone – immediately hop into bed. If it doesn’t work hop into bed with his/her brother/sister/best friend. This can happen within the hour or day or week – never as long as a month. A bit incestuous don’t you think? Babies result and there is no knowing “Whose the daddy?”
2. Music videos – girls trying to wear their little sister’s clothing – letting it all hang out – sexual moves – undulating on the floor, pouting, finger pulled down the side of the mouth. Guys simulating the sexual act either by themselves or having grabbed the first compliant girl.
3. Lyrics – all very sexual – not even suggestive – just blatant. Some of the music is beautiful but the words... Remember the song “It wasn’t me”.
4. Adverts for sexual aids and preventatives, condoms etc – usually depicted on the first date. (I love the one ad that uses a tennis match to simulate Boy/Girl foreplay only to have the girl refuse to take the game any further.)
5. Movies don’t seem to be funny if perfect strangers don’t have sex. There is so much adultery depicted in movies. Man is always out for what they can get. The girl who puts out is a slut and the girl who doesn’t is a cock-tease.
6. Clothing – all out to conspire to make the man’s blood boil. Please don’t get me wrong on this one. I really don’t believe that suggestive clothing causes rape. Grannies wearing typical granny wear have been raped and so have nuns. It is just the sick society. The clothing is titillating man’s sexual appetite they begin to feel if a girl doesn’t “put out” she is not worth the relationship.
7. Dancing – (I am a ballroom and Latin teacher) – the rawer forms of dancing, hip hop etc are becoming very sexual. We can possibly lay part of the blame on Michael Jackson – (btw I love his music!). BUT I can’t take it when I see little kids emulating his hip gyrations and crotch clutching antics.
8. Modelling for little kids who are being forced to display their flimsy outfits in a sexual way.
Okay so what is sex?
- · Some will say it is procreation. – Perfectly correct.
- · Some will say it is for relaxation – Perfectly correct.
- · Some will say it shows love – again perfectly correct.
- · Some will say it is beautiful – YES it is.
- · Some will say it is a way that you can show respect for your partner – NOW we are getting somewhere.
Let us look at the other side of the coin
- · We practice birth control
- · We can relax by ourselves – we do not need a partner for that.
- · How can you love someone you have just met? Love is a feeling that grows as you establish a relationship. A lot of people confuse Love and Lust.
- · What is beautiful in taking a partner into an alley or toilet for a quickie?
- · How can you respect someone you don’t know? How can you respect someone who tells you “NO” and you overpower her?
I really would love to see sex become a beautiful thing
between two loving partners who have learned to love and respect each other.
I would love to never see young, nubile scantily clad
females writhing on the floor as they simulate the “love” act to music.
On that note who in their right mind would have written a
sexual song about Yoga?
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